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Whitney Houston - I Learned From The Best (Official Music Video) - More bloopers are a click away

Have you ever had a dream so sweet that it seemed so real. That every time you opened your eyes you blinked wanting to get back to that dream. Every smile is different because it's not from the face you want or wish. Every touch feels off and the very thought of another doing it separates your rational thinking. Well you should have thought about that before you broke my heart and walked away!

Your not really ready to let go
you want things to go back to a time
when I was yours and it was my kiss that melted your heart
A time when it was my touch that gave you chills and yarn for more
I'm not ready to let you go either not ready to move to another
I'm not ready to hate you, I will forgive you
Not ready to cry another night , so I won't give you the power
You say now you have learned your lesson and ready to comeback
I'm not ready to take you back or try
You say what happen to second chances and forgiveness
I say I forgive and here is your second chance to be a friend
Not being cold and not being cruel, honest truth I a fool just for you
I'm not ready for another heartbreak or another lie
You say your ready
Well I'm NOT
I just want you to do me a favor and think real hard about what you lost
A
Strong
Independent
Supportive
Driven
Loyal
Loving, Caring, Catering
Devoted Women
I want you to think about that every time
Every women you meet or come across won't ever treat you like me
Don't worry I don't hold a grudge I'm still here and you still have my heart
It's the distance in which you have that is different now
Don't worry I haven't given up on you yet
I know that the man I dreamed of is in there
he just isn't right now
I warned you
I told you
I begged you
You weren't ready to be that man I know you could be
You say you weren't ready not yet
I try to be sweet and sit back and wait
So you can be at peace I won't hurt you the way you did me
Cause I see that life already is giving it back to you
I wouldn't ever
cheat
lie
betray you in anyway
run game on you
I know you need to grow and you need to do that without me
Comeback when your MAN
I'll stand by you but not with you
If it's meant to be it will be
I'm not ready to fight for you
You need to be willing to fight for me
I still and always will love you
But I LOVE ME MORE
The sun will shine another day and I'll smile another morning with or without you
But it's up to you
Grow up and be a MAN
Because I'm not ready to settle down
and play games with a boy
So you write the ending or beginning it's on you

By: Geneva Relf

KNOWING YOUR MVP STATUS KEEP YOUR SWAG UP

Calling all MVP's in this game we call life, and I'm calling all those that have lost they swag and want it back. I'm looking for those who want to be something in life and be something great. It's time to get polished up and turn our shine on again. We need to start going back to showing these other lames how it's done. We need to turn our shine on and encourage the haters on, because without them there is no us!

You want someone to hate on and you want someone to talk about here I am enjoy please! See cause I know that my swag is on point and the more haters I have the greater I must be. Fellas I don't need a man to spend a dime on me, or take care of me. Ladies we need to start back being independent and being the boss. Don't get me wrong we all want a strong, intelligent, handsome men in our life's. However most of us get one a forget who we are at times and seem to let them have all the power. No more we are diamonds and need to be polished by the best. Furthermore in order to get the man you want ladies means being the woman we are suppose to be.

1. Cooking- Is a must we need to go back to cooking real meals every now and again

2. Cleaning up- Enough said

3. Dressing up and reminding him why is so lucky. Nevertheless why he must stay on point.

4. Surprises- Ladies every now and again you surprise him with gifts

5.Independent- Have your own and be your own person

6. Ladies- Being soft, Smile Sometimes, Laugh More

Now I can't get on the women without hitting on the men too ! See I have seen a lot of things changed over the years and Fellas if you want that dime piece or that fly women.
You need to realize that real gets real and what you put out is what you get back. Men need to go back to being men and standing tall. We want the type of man that can and will handle business and take care of business. However now a day it seems most men just want to be players or just simply play games. Sorry but that might have worked back in the day, but we don't have time for you lame games. We want men and we want them now to be honest !

1. Work- Get a Job, and then go to work

2. Be honest- Stop playing games be up front and tell us what you want

3. Gentlemen- Open doors, and pull out chairs, and pay for dinner when you ASK us out

4. Hygiene- don't just look clean be clean too

5. New Era- cook and clean

6. Man up- Don't be afraid to grow up

Time to turn the swag back on and get what you deserve out of life. Time to make the haters earn their money this year. Time to start standing back tall, and holding our heads back up and being fly like only we can. It's time to get off the bench and on the court it's fourth quarter baby. Final two minutes and you have the ball either you make the basket or you don't. However either way you have to get in the game to play to find out right! Turn your swag on and don't let anyone turn it off. You hold the power and have all the keys to your success in life so don't throw it away. You only get one chance to live so I suggest you start now and take it.

Check your Swag at the door

I'm fly so you know you better come with it if you want to hang

I got the swag so where is your game

I'm the ticket so baby get out of line

I'm a sold out event you should supported

You thought you had me with that lame stuff

Darling I'm the MVP I run this show

Why you looking around I know you know

I don't have to wait for the sun to come out

My swag is always on that's why I

SHINE

So hate on haters give me more motivation

Cause I'll pass you and you'll still be hating

My SHINE is so bright

I'm illegal and can't drive at night

So for now until death I just plan to

SHINE

By: Geneva Relf

Breaking Me Down

Chris Brown - Say Goodbye (2006)

Apart of me understood what was about to take place in my life. Another part just wanted to imagine the opposite and ignore the facts on the walls. Everything around me pointed to one conclusion while I prayed for another one. How is it we always over look the details in the people were around? Why are our hearts hurt for those who seem to careless? I have had some heartbreaks in my life but none ever like this. I look in the mirror most days and wonder how I have fallen so far from where I once was in life. The women who once stood even when she felt she was falling apart. Is now starring in the mirror trying to find herself again, and the women who once took the pain with a smile. Now cries her self to sleep looking for answers in her tears. What could have done this to a women so strong and bold?

A women who once knew her worth is now questioning if she has any at all anymore. A women who once understood that you have to keep your head up and smile strong to prove your enemies wrong. Is now at the mercy of their feet begging for relief, and trying to break free. Too scared to sleep some nights, don't want the dreams of what might have been for me. Those have turned into nightmares that hunt me and send me to my knees in prayer. I look to heaven and blame myself, but ask God for mercy and seek his help. I once asked how can a man destroy the world, but now I see how he can. As women we carry and bring forth life, destroy us destroy the cycle that brings in life.

When is being a good women not enough and caring no longer matters? When the things you'll do to make them happy no longer makes them smile, what are you to do? When you have no one to turn to because your ashamed to say you weren't enough. Your best wasn't good enough, your heart wasn't good enough, and your devotion to their dreams wasn't strong enough. How do you face the day when your waiting to be asked what you did wrong, and why you weren't able to hold on? I once use to stand tall and over look all the small things, and focus on the bigger picture.

The Truth is I have to be strong and move right along. I heard a wise women once say to me "Sad in the beginning but a broken heart in the future will feel way worse." Meaning that it's better to know now then to find out later. I agree I mean I can deal with this pain now, but the thought of holding on to a lie into the future is brutal!

Your lies were never in your eyes

Your deception was never in your kiss

Your intentions were never mentioned and never spoken

Your hands wouldn't dare touch me with pain, but yet it was your actions that did it all

You swear that's not it, but yet what I have seen says it all

Why

Just tell me why

You had me benched until the fourth quarter and I'm the star

You had me on the sidelines with these other lames and I'm the MVP

You had me waiting in line and I was the ticket

You'll see that they won't compare to me I'm not your reserve

I'm not for your safe keep

You no longer have the key to my heart

It changed and won't be open again

You taught me a lesson That I should have learned years ago

You taught me what is it I already knew I should know

You may have hurt me but you didn't destroy me

And why is this important to me

Because you'll never get the chance you should of when you had me.

BY: Geneva Relf

FEW WORDS

In life we say so much, but how much weight do our words really hold. I mean when we say things at the time they make sense and may even feel righteous but when we look back are they? I often wonder how many times can you say your sorry before it's pointless and meaning less? It's unquestionable sometimes the way we treat each other and how we forget that words can never be taken back. Our actions have more karma then we think and that sometimes I'm sorry doesn't cover the cost of it. I often question myself at night and wonder if I could or should have done things differently.

Furthermore I question if maybe I should have chosen a different path and selected different words. Even the smallest arguments to some mean more to others and have more weight on their hearts then we can imagine. All of my mistakes weigh on me like a heavy shadow. A shadow that I can't hide or run from most days, but all I can do is look up and hope that God sees the pain and sorry heart that I have when they don't.

The point I'm trying to make is that you will make mistakes and even put yourself in a position where your a target by accident or choice. However all you can do at the end of the day is say sorry and pray that God heard and saw your heart. See I make mistakes daily and I have a heart that is in inconstant forgive me mode, because my fear is not when I stop saying sorry, but when I stop meaning it. From my lips and heart to Gods ears and heart I hope that I always mean it and strive to do better and change my path of errors.

Songs to Listen too For Courage and Inspiration:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9x06Z2-apBg Marvin Sapp

Never Would have made it

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-s7QNpqiqsc Tyler Perry

Father Can you hear me

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gTjSCy-R2-M Kirk Franklin

Lean on me

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FmQBshQ11uo Mary Mary

Can't give up now

By: Geneva Relf

IF IT MAKES YOU STRONGER & BETTER

Every struggle and heartbreak isn't for the breaking of you but the building of you. Sometimes it seems like the sun is shinning so bright and yet the blessings of it's rays never touches you. The grace of the beauty of it you never seem to feel because all you feel is your hurt and pain. Everyone seem to be happy and going on with the most perfect lives in the world and yours is the only one falling apart. Where it seems your tears are your only friends and the only constant thing in your life. I have been there plenty of times but the key is to get up and not stay down to realize that you have to stand. Life is a gift that can't be returned or exchanged for another and you only have one to live ! You have to look at the lessons that come with every challenge and learn from them. See the point in every heart break and strive for better in your life instead of waiting on answers to why. If we only knew that sometimes we hold on to the very thing that is destroying us. We would be so much further up the road that we call life if we just let go and moved on. We hold so much pain inside and carry so much weight on our shoulders that even when were happy we can still feel the unhappiness inside.

Don't get me wrong were human and it's in our nature to get down at times, and to feel weak almost destroyed by the things that happen around us. However the blessing we have is that we don't have to stay that way. That there is always a new day and another chance to smile and see the beauty in life and all it offers. The fact that at the end of the day it's over and you can sleep that pain away and move on. My grandmother use to say "Stay Sweet" to me all the time every time I cried, or got down that's what she would say. It took her passing away and years of bumping my head to get the point in that. See you can be hurt by some of the coldest people in the world, or even by those who are close to you. However you have to keep your head up and smile and go on living. Don't let them steal your joy and peace because you have to live with you not them. At times when I'm down I can still hear her say "Stay Sweet" and I smile and think about all those times I could have given up, but didn't so why do it now.

We all make mistakes but the biggest one we make is not learning from them and growing for the better. We all have done something that we wish people would forget and let go, but you have to just live your life and let them live theirs. The minute you let it go and forgive yourself they lose all that power, eventually moving too. You control the power you give people in your life and the control they have over you. There is nothing worse then a broken heart that is kept by the heart breaker. The idea of hoping they comeback and realize the mistake they made or making. Meanwhile they are doing their thing and you drowning your pillows and staying home and waiting by the phone. For a call that may never be what you want it to be, and if it is will things really be different? Can they really be the one that doesn't hurt you or lie to you anymore, and have they really changed or is the fact you that stayed around and always will? I have always been the type of women who realizes that there are three types of people in this world and you have to decide which one you are:

1- Childish- Staying hurt and never moving on. Keeping that pain with you and holding it against others.

2- Equalizer- They got you so now you have to get them back.

3- Survivor- Dust off and Get up keep it moving with hopes for a better day and change

I'm a three and have grown to understand that being childish will get you no where. A lot of people don't recognize their true self-worth and will allow people to treat them any kinda way! So they try to get even and be number two. However after years of that it gets old and you have to start realizing that life has to be more then a game of tag. Start to survive and live your life and make it what you want to make it. Depend on yourself and learn to do for yourself we need to be more independent not just money wise but thinking wise too. Stand on your own two feet and grow up and learn that life is hard for everyone.

Love is an amazing thing that we have been blessed with in life. Love for yourself, and those around you and even that special person.When you find that person who make you feel like your above the world and no matter what happens they are there. The type of person with eyes that show you more the just you, but the both of you and what it could be. The love we have for our self should surpass anything we go through we should love our self enough to get up and live. Family and close loyal friends that have a positive outlook and advice. We should start surrounding our self with positive thinking people and cut out the negative voices in our ears and life. Life is only over when you choose to no longer live it.

By: Geneva Relf

Talk About Pressure

I have grown up my entire life with rules and guidelines that never questioned before. I was the good girl who never ask question or even considered doing anything to taint my name. I have lived that way for along time and never planned on changing that. Then One day this man whom I have never encountered before comes in my life and all the feelings I thought were wrong and not bad I began to feel. I wasn't sure why I didn't even know him but there was something that made him shine. A beauty you only read in those novels that look cheesy on the cover, or that are so graphic you feel guilty for even touching them. Yet for me I just kept my distance I didn't know what to do or even if what I felt was real. One night of just sleeping in his arms proved that it wasn't lust but a great like. A connection of your souls counterpart that can't be denied or even ignored but yet as innocent as that night was and the beauty of the look on his face in the morning light wasn't enough. His life will take him from me and down a path so far from my own and the question of should I risk it chance it on something I know for sure.

Just like that he was gone to live his life and me left to wonder what if, and should I have done anything different. Then out of the blue a friend whom I thought forgot me and I hadn't seen in years comes back with a mission ME. He said that he always had a thing for me and that I was the one girl he felt something strong for. I wondered what is the something strong and why now tell? His life was taking him to a country so far from me in such little time yet he wanted to test the waters. See what could have been and even what might still be for us and could we make it work. He do you test waters with a man who doesn't want a girlfriend or commitment but just wants to see what happens. I want to say no when he looks at me but his eyes have a calming effect, his arms are strong but yet gentle and his words are soft to sweet to be real. Yet I trust him but I refuse to give in to the uncertain territory he has traveled already. The fact he is so far advanced then me in life often puzzles me why he bothers me.


I mean he could be with plenty of girls that wouldn't deny him or fear the next move. Yet I'm holding my breath I'm just waiting for him to mess up or change his mind. Why me is all I think when he calls? Is the thought of my innocents that precious to him like a target or bulls eye he can't miss. What should I do when he says that it's not like that, but when were alone it feels like that. Evey kiss ends with a thank you and yet I wonder why? Is it a gift to you or a job well done is it the idea that you might be getting close that is so appealing to you? I don't know and to afraid to ask him really. The pressure is to much at times that I can't breath I try to explain I'm not there yet and I'm not ready for all that. Yet it seems to be a challenge for him a task to be complete before he leaves me. I'm not there yet but he is and has been for a long time and can a man who has done so much be content with so little now? When the basics don't please him anymore then what and when no is no longer clear then what? I often question my whole up bringing but I wouldn't be the girl I am today. So I'll just wait and hope he can wait with me or that maybe I should just relax and not think so much about these things. Life has too many ways of stressing a person out this should be on top of that.

By: Geneva Relf